The Dickinson Caf Series - (Part 1: The Hot Shave)

So I am currently writing my senior thesis on the memory of James Wilson. Pretty disappointing stuff right there since I had always planned on writing it on the greatest and most magical place on campus (maybe Earth), that's right...the Caf! Anyone who disagrees with me is just plain wrong and kind of lame. My best memories and time spent at Dickinson College have been in the Caf. From one bites to Jello races to range discussions to awkward sex position napkin drawings to same siding, my bonds of friendship with Jive have grown through the Caf. The Jive Table has been a staple of my college career and the times spent there after practice, delaying trips to the lib, sobering up on a weekend morning or just simply procrastinating from doing anything were truly special.

Now while the Caf offers good and bad, there is no other place that is so important to your Dickinson College career. Over my 4 years I have sat and learned from some of the biggest caf legends Jive has ever seen. Starting back during Freshman year with Chappers and DJ. These guys were still on traditional and never turned down a great Weekend morning caf sit. Chappers even had to take a dump twice during one of these. Fast forward to today with The Fish, who still has the record for chicken tenders in one sitting. Tell me a time you were in the caf and this kid wasn't. Doesn't exist. The guy had 4 bowls of potato soup and 4 cokes and it wasn't even 11: AM yet! Coffee black, none of that weak shit.

I have always loved the caf and it is about time that it has been broken down. I want to explore the ins and outs, the good and bad and all the rest. The secrets, the cycles, the meals and everything in between. Because nothing pisses me off more than freshman coming back with plates that look like puke. So in this 10 part series, I will dissect everything that comes to mind about the best place on campus!

As Martin Luther King Jr famously said: "Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity of your own Cafeteria!"

Part 1: The Hot Shave

Any veteran Caf student already knows that on average, lunch is better than dinner. A big reason for this are the Hot Shave sandwiches. No matter what that menu may bring and trust me, sometimes it can be bad, the hot shave will consistently deliver satisfaction. Whether you are getting two of them to make your meal or just one as a nice side dish to your plate of chicken nugs, the Hot Shave is a simple warm deli meat sandwich that gets the job done. Now lets remember, all hot shaves were not created equally. The Caf offers seven varieties of the sandwich, 4 regular weekly sandwich's and 3 special hot shaves that cycle every week. Lets break these down.

The Usual Suspects

Roast Beef: Statistically the most popular Hot Shave. One of the big reasons for this Hot Shave being so popular is the Au Jus that accompanies it. The Roast beef is the most tender of the Shave's and dipped in Au Jus gives you your own French Dip for lunch. Combine that with it's popular cheese compliment Pepper Jack, and you have one delicious sandwich for lunch. For those who want more, some put tiger sauce on their Roast beef, while others will either grill or microwave their sandwiches to either melt the cheese more and get the bread nice and toasty. While there are times bad batches of beef that are dry and fatty, A good Hot Shave Roast Beef sandwich is hard to beat.
Ranking: 9/10

Roast Turkey: The first of three turkey options and probably my favorite. While some complain that the Turkey is too dry, I often find the Roast Turkey surprisingly moist and flavorful. While this sandwich won't save you from a crappy lunch, it is a great compliment to a chicken dish. My favorite paring for this sandwich would be on Cycle 1 Monday lunch when the Buffalo Chicken Penne Stir Fry with Blue Cheese is on the grill. You could even eat this sandwich while you wait in line!
Ranking: 7/10

Smoked Turkey: The second of the turkey options and probably the worst. Honestly do you know what smoked turkey means in the Caf.....dry turkey. The smoked turkey doesn't actually add any smoky flavor, it is just a dry version of the roast turkey. While in the past I have elected for one of these, today I don't even bother. Who the fuck wants dry turkey! Not even melted cheese or cream of mushroom soup can save this one.
Ranking: 3/10

Baked Ham/Pork Tenderloin: Maybe the least popular sandwich because of the large Jewish population. Neeeeeeeever. Seriously though, while I like Ham, there are probably less than 10 percent of lunchers that get this menu item. And for some reason, baked ham is always on days with the worst menus. For example: Cycle 3 Wednesday -Baked Ham paired with 3 foot cheese steak grinder and baked macaroni and cheese. O yea and the grill: Marsala chicken salad with grapes. These are the days where you just say fuck it and get grab and go. The Ham is consistent and salty and goes well with a little melted Swiss. Not ideal but what is these days. Note: Pork Tenderloin sometimes subs but it is honestly just dry thick ham.
Ranking: 5/10 (Pork Tenderloin 4/10)

Specialty Shaves.

Corned Beef: One of the special shaves and one of my favorites. Again it is because I am actually Jewish. Seriously though, the corned beef is a fantastic hot shave. You can never get a bad batch of this meat. Always tender and flavorful with a hint of spice, the Corned beef can save a lunch with its perfection. A very consistent hot shave. Note: They serve it on shitty rye bread. The best way to eat beef is to hit up the deli for a potato bun and grill it. I like it I like it a lot. Ranking: 9/10

Pastrami: If you ask me, I can't tell the difference between the two meats. Both however are delicious. T Gags rates it number 1 on it with swiss on rye. Moonshine also prefers the Pastrami. Again, I like to avoid getting it on the rye bread. It honestly ruins the sandwich for me. Anytime they offer the Corned Beef or the Pastrami, i am getting two of these bad boys.
Ranking: 8/10

Pepper Turkey: The last of the Turkey's and probably the most polarizing hot shave. Of the three speciality hot shaves, this one can either be amazing or disappoint like no other. Just ask Nate Grefe aka Sir Bitch a Lot, "Pepper Turkey on a good day. With pepper jack cheese, it's tender and very flavorful and all the spices are great together. Other times it is dry and tastes like dog shit." I am not a huge fan of the Pepper Turkey but it can hold its own. Ranking: 5/10

Overall, the Hot Shave is the heart and soul of lunch. I get it 90 percent of the time I am there and am constantly satisfied with them. Before I reveal my favorite, lets take a look at what some other Hot Shave veterans have to say.

The Fish: "Roast Beef for the delicate interplay of flavor between beef and the spices of pepper jack; a meaty yet spicy combo."

Who? Dan Jones: "Roast Beef because it is served with tiger sauce and you can get it with double pepper jack. Probably top 5 caf dishes period!"

Voodoo: "Depends on the day but I'm a huge fan of ham but only with cheddar. It's delicious, doesn't need any condiments, and is always consistent.

Schachter: Roast Beef with pepper jack but only if its good. The new roast beef last year was pretty shit. I'd probably say roast turkey with provolone because of all the fixings you can do with it. Consistently good!

So as you can see, there is no consensus. But what is important is more than just the meat. The cheese, bread, sauce and other fixings are just as essential to a great Hot shave. For me, I am going with the Corned Beef with double American cheese grilled on a potato bun to a nice brown finish. Give me two of these and some waffle fries and I am good to go. So what is your favorite hot shave?

Check back next time for Part 2 of the Caf